


First and Third

by EzraTheBlue



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Valentine's Day Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-15
Updated: 2017-02-15
Packaged: 2018-09-24 15:49:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9769097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EzraTheBlue/pseuds/EzraTheBlue
Summary: Hakkai is celebrating, but Gojyo's not sure why.Written for the anonymous prompt "Getting a valentine for the first time."





	

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the anonymous prompt from Tumblr, "Getting a valentine for the first time." I decided to be a little creative in how I approached it.
> 
> Rated for mentions of sexytimes only, but no actual sexing occurs. Sorry! 
> 
> Warning for extreme fluff.

**First and Third**

The first time, Gojyo was just plain happy to be surprised. He wasn't sure he deserved it, but he wouldn't say no. He couldn't think of any reason for Hakkai to leave him a present on a blustery February day. The box of chocolates on the table had his name on the tag, so they were obviously for him. He devoured every single one of them while Hakkai was putting the laundry out on the line. Hakkai returned to find the empty box on the table, and smiled at Gojyo over the empty basket.

"Did you enjoy your present?"

Gojyo returned a sheepish, languid grin. "They were real good. Sorry I didn't share."

"Oh, no, those were all for you." Then, he'd crossed left the clothes in the basket sitting on the table and crossed the room to kiss him on the forehead. "But perhaps you can give me a taste?" Hakkai leaned down and kissed him square on the lips, and Gojyo lost himself in the kiss. Gojyo had no idea why Hakkai was being so nice to him, but he sure as hell wasn't going to ask questions when something in the quirk of his smile made promises Gojyo intended to keep.

A few weeks later, Gojyo noticed Hakkai watching him throughout the day, as if waiting for something. When he left that night to hit the card tables, Hakkai looked immensely disappointed. Not sad, not lonely, just disappointed. Gojyo tried not to think too hard about why, since he couldn't remember doing anything wrong, but made sure to win a big pot to bring home to him in case that was the problem. From the way Hakkai sulked about for the next few days, lips drawn into a thin and tight smile like the drawn strings of a purse, and from how he was equally as generous with his love and affection as the same tightly-drawn purse might be generous with its contents, money wasn't the problem, but Gojyo had no idea what was.

Hakkai got over it, whatever it was.

The second time, the next year, it was a bottle of plum wine and a well-made dinner to surprise him on another cold February day. Gojyo had no idea what he had done to deserve it, but he wouldn't let this sort of treat be lost on him. Steak -- Hakkai must have worked some extra compensation out of Sanzo -- and sauteed shisho, all served in beautiful rich brown sauce over rice noodles, and Hakkai let him have seconds and as much wine as he wanted, smiling dotingly from his place, and Gojyo forgot he was in his own ramshackle little kitchen and lost himself in Hakkai's adoration. Drunk and full and happy, he let Hakkai take him on the floor, singing his praises as his lover rode him to paradise.

Then, a few weeks later, again. The expectation, the disappointment. Hakkai actually didn't talk to him for a few days. Gojyo was on the verge of freezing to death on a cold shoulder when Hakkai finally broke the ice with a gentle, "alright, then," and tried to pick up as if nothing had happened. Which suited Gojyo fine, because as far as he could tell, nothing had!

He'd apologize if he knew what he'd done wrong, but even though he was new to this "fucking one person on the regular" shit (had practically signed his soul off to him the night he shoved his guts back in and took a mortgage on the loan the night Hakkai had saved his life), he thought he was doing the right things! He only flirted at bars, he shared, they talked about shit now, they were two sides of a coin. He would do anything for Hakkai, he was still sometimes embarrassed at just how hard his heart beat when he thought about him. That's what love was, if he was ever worthy of it.

Love or no, Gojyo wasn't sure where this hot and cold behavior was coming from, but Hakkai was weird. It was something he'd come to accept. Maybe Hakkai would just be weird sometimes. He thought he could handle that, even if it did bother him.

The next year, when February arrived again, they were somewhere on the path along that road trip from hell, stopped over in a little market. Gojyo was “helping” (read: acting as pack mule and chain-smoking) as Hakkai traversed the stores, but as they filled out the list, he noticed Hakkai looking around for something. Gojyo noticed, and hopped a step closer. “What's left to get? I'm pretty sure we got everything Cherry-chan asked for.”

“Ah, nothing on the shopping list!” Hakkai glanced over his shoulder, smiling wryly. “I wanted to get you a little treat. For the two of us, to celebrate.” His smile dipped, nearly imperceptibly. “You know.”

Gojyo didn't. He frantically searched through his head to remember what was special about February, what they were celebrating, but not a damn thing came to mind. He recalled Hakkai surprising him with chocolate their first February together and a really nice meal the second, but a celebration? He didn't have the first clue! He clammed up tight, mumbling out, “Whatever you think is best, y'know. I ain't picky.”

Hakkai chuckled and turned back around, only to pause at the next window. “Ah.” He stilled, and Gojyo stopped at his side, taking advantage of a moment to light a cigarette. Hakkai was admiring some chunky-looking woven blankets in the store window. “If only we had room in the budget Sanzo gave us for some of those. Camping out can get cold, especially at this time of year.”

“Pfft, budget.” Gojyo rolled his eyes at the thought. “Give that tightwad a few months, see if he doesn't loosen up on that shit.”

Hakkai laughed again, soft and meaningless, but walked on. “Perhaps.” Gojyo studied the blankets a minute longer: the weave that looked like a comfy sweater, thick, cuddly-looking olive green yarn. Hakkai had been complaining (in his subtle way) about the cold, maybe something like this would be nice. Besides, Hakkai was celebrating him for no good reason, maybe he should celebrate right back.

Hakkai couldn't do much in such harried conditions, but he somehow scraped together a tiny chocolate cake and hid it from Goku long enough for he and Gojyo to share it in the privacy of the kitchen alcove before sharing a few sweet kisses (and no more, sadly, because Sanzo would hear them and give them grief), but when Hakkai retired to sleep, Gojyo slipped out, found a card house, and made to multiply the paltry change left in his pocket.

Whatever fancy blankets cost, it was way more than ten yuan and a ramen shop coupon. Hakkai was worth whatever this was going to take.

Over the next weeks, Gojyo surreptitiously gambled his funds up, but between the days without civilization and the occasional hit of bad luck, it actually took him a month all told before the money in his pocket had enough heft that he felt confident approaching a vendor selling very similar blankets in a town unfathomably far from the town where Hakkai had first pointed them out. The one he found wasn't the same blanket, but it was similar, and lucky him, there was one left. When Gojyo picked it up off of the table, it was as fluffy as a cloud looked, and quickly warmed in his hands. Perfect. White might not clean as easily, but he was sure if anyone could keep a white blanket clean in the wilderness, it was Hakkai.

Hakkai was settled in their inn when Gojyo arrived back, warming his feet by the fire in the communal lobby and looking pensive. Gojyo realized it was that same funk he sank into the last two Marches. No way, not today. He crept up behind him, walking as softly as possible, but Hakkai still spun around right as Gojyo moved to drop the blanket on his shoulders. He only succeeded in dropping it directly on Hakkai's face. Hakkai made a soft, surprised noise and fumbled the blanket away from his mouth.

"Gojyo - what's -"

Gojyo recovered and fixed the blanket to wrap it around Hakkai's arms like a shawl. "Surprise! I saw you lookin' at blankets, and you always get so cold when we camp out, so thought I'd pick it up for ya!" He expected 'thanks' and an eager smile, the way he did when he noticed Gojyo pick up his socks or put his empties in the recycling bin at home. Instead, Hakkai looked a little devastated, and Gojyo was crestfallen. "I, uh, thought you'd be happy."

"I... I am, I'm just... surprised." Hakkai lifted the blanket in his hands. "You remembered White Day."

"White Day?" Gojyo thought he'd heard of that, but wasn't sure what it meant. No point in pretending. "Uh, sure. If I knew what that was."

"You don't know?" Hakkai lifted his face, his unreadable expression shifting into surprise. "It's paired with Valentine's Day. Two sides of a romantic holiday."

Valentine's Day? Gojyo cocked his head, and Hakkai raised a hand to his mouth. "You didn't know? My goodness, you didn't know." He shook his head slowly, caught between a smile and shock. "Oh, Gojyo, I'm so sorry..."

"For what?!" Gojyo crossed his arms. "I have no idea what you're talking about!"

Hakkai was fighting back mirthful laughter, but composed himself enough to say, "On St. Valentine's Day – February 14th – women present men with chocolate. In the West, it's a day for partners to show how much they care for each other. When I was a child, all the girls in the orphanage were forced to give candy to the boys, even to me."

Gojyo had never heard of this, or if he had, it was lost under years alone. He knew for sure nobody before Hakkai had ever just given him chocolate, let alone on February 14th. "And what the hell is White Day?"

"March 14th. Men have to return presents to any woman who gave him chocolate, usually something white, like white chocolate for the basics, or lingerie for a woman with whom they're intimate. It's meant to show how much he values her." Hakkai bit back a laugh, rubbing his forehead as his cheeks turned pink, but he sobered as he went on: "I wanted to celebrate these days with you like I had before. I wanted to make you feel loved and special, but when you got me nothing in return, I... I thought you'd forgotten." His chin dropped, touching the blanket where it was cast around his neck. "Or that I wasn't worth it."

Horror lashed through Gojyo. "Hell no! Shit, of course you're worth it!" He circled around the chair and got down in front of Hakkai, grabbing his hands as he twisted back around to follow. "I didn't know, okay? I would'a gotten you stuff if I'd known!"

"It's alright!" Hakkai cupped Gojyo's cheek in his hand. "I simply feel dreadful for punishing you before, for not knowing!" He ran his thumb over Gojyo's scars and jawline. "I should have known."

Gojyo winced and shook his head, then pulled his hands from Hakkai's and twisted them up into a pleading knot. "What do I do to make this up to you?"

Hakkai considered for a moment, then shook his head. "You don't have to." He leaned forward and slid his fingers up into Gojyo's hair. "Why don't we count this as the first one?"

Gojyo felt his heart lift a little, and grinned. "Fresh start?"

"Everyone deserves one. After all, you gave me mine, and much more than I ever asked for." Hakkai leaned forward to kiss Gojyo on the cheek, then smiled his contentment and gazed into Gojyo's eyes. "And you've gotten to a very good one." He traced the edge of the blanket. "This is surely worth much more than three times more than what I gave you before."

"Three times, eh? Is that the standard?" Gojyo smirked to himself, as Hakkai nodded.

"A man should give a woman something three times the value of what she gave him, so it's said. It's not how it was done in the orphanage, but--"

"Yeah, three ain't enough." Gojyo stood up, smirking down at Hakkai. "You're worth way, way, way more than that to me." Without warning, he scooped Hakkai up into his arms, letting the blanket fall around him like a bridal veil as Hakkai, flustered, seized Gojyo around the neck. "Maybe eight times. Maybe eight-hundred."

Hakkai sounded somewhere between embarrassed and chiding, the scold all wrapped up in a whisper of his name, but Gojyo shook his head.

"That's what you said this is for, right? How much I love and value you? I wouldn't be here without you. So, how about a demonstration?"

Hakkai laughed, and settled into Gojyo's arms. "Anything you like."

For the first time, Gojyo realized what it was to have someone offer out his very heart to him. From here on, though, he would always make sure to accept it with careful hands and return the gift bigger and better. That's what love was.


End file.
